Even the prettiest smile can be faked

I have to say to you that i'm complicated, not an easy person. I have issues with my mind, body and the whole thing being in this world. I've got scars inside and out, mind and body. It's true i'm weak, it's true i'm strong but only with a second it can all change...

My pulse is racing, heart maybe skipping a beat. Heavy breath and lost eyes.

Cold feeling,

try to be unnoticed,

be undercover,

stay calm..

stay calm..

breath in..

and out..

It's gonna be allright

Not everyone can take panicattacks and survive the inside pain they put you throug when you watch someone suffer and try to take care of it and make it better.

Even my sensitivity is a problem and i think you already know that. There are days when i wake up with a smile on my face but cry myself to sleep. Sometimes i just snap in the middle of the conversation. That's what a bipolar is. Im not agressive but sometimes i can be a kid or a monster, i can't argue with that. Sometimes im so childish i'm ashemed of myself and then crash. I really don't cry often but when i do, i can't stop myself. I hope you understand.

When i'm down i can rise again. Just breath in and let the hurt go. Cry it out. The worst part is that there is no one else to blame. So darling forgive me so i can be me again. I have been here many times before and i know it will be better. Just not now, maybe tomorrow..
Don't chain me, don't lock me up.
Even the prettiest smile can be faked. So don't forget me if you are leaving now..

I'm not a princess but i can be happy and well behaved when you show me what i mean to you, really.
Could you wake up tomorrow for me.  Could you still love me if my mind is only skin n' bones..?